Love Beyond Terror
I am terrified in love with you
like a patient before open-heart surgery
scared of the saw that sends
sternum bone-fragments flying
away into midair
before falling.
Instead of massaging it gently
into life rhythm,
I am scared you will squeeze my heart
until it spreads through your fingers
like raw meatloaf mix
that’s molded into whatever shape you want.
I am terrified
that I will never come off life support
and be in a permanent vegetative state
until someone else pulls the plug
that I cannot,
and I hate this fear.
Yet still I love you.
For I know there is a greater love
that conquers all terror
that heals through bone-flying pain,
pumping life through fear-clogged arteries,
and it is in that hope
that I love into courage
beyond.
© Tess Lockhart, 2008. All rights reserved.
like a patient before open-heart surgery
scared of the saw that sends
sternum bone-fragments flying
away into midair
before falling.
Instead of massaging it gently
into life rhythm,
I am scared you will squeeze my heart
until it spreads through your fingers
like raw meatloaf mix
that’s molded into whatever shape you want.
I am terrified
that I will never come off life support
and be in a permanent vegetative state
until someone else pulls the plug
that I cannot,
and I hate this fear.
Yet still I love you.
For I know there is a greater love
that conquers all terror
that heals through bone-flying pain,
pumping life through fear-clogged arteries,
and it is in that hope
that I love into courage
beyond.
© Tess Lockhart, 2008. All rights reserved.
